things that shouldnt hurt to hear, cut like a knife. one simple statement sends me from feeling amazing to tearing up because it hurts. and its then that i realise im still hurting underneath it all, ive just blocked it out. blerghh :(

so in other news....well i have a tattooing apprenticeship with an epic guy named marco who keeps calling me his 'new legacy', hes perfectly charming though, i actually think him and i might end up being good friends, his work environment isnt that of work, he says its family. you are all a tight nit family in there, you're honest with each other, loving, supportive and you all have each others backs. he said to me 'welcome to the family' then gave me a massive hug, so im feeling pretty stoked about starting!

what other shits been on my mind, well physically im doing pretty well, ive gained some weight so im no longer a dinosaur, im toning up and generally looking pretty well, im also eating properly. i now have dreds in my hair, with beads and shit, very jack sparrow like. but ive also noticed how ive become slightly more femanine again, less of the lesbian look, which is interesting, i guess times are changing and im changing...anyhow, erm what else? alls good with friends etc, soph is soph, callum is callum, jake is jake, just the little group of misfits that we are, but its nice, theyre my best friends and i feel completely accepted by them, i mean soph, her and i had a bust up saturday, a big one, and by sunday morning we were both on the phone apologising, i guess its then that you know someones your best friend...or atleast one of them. family shit is crap, as per, but hey ho, life goes on. rocky is epic as ever, my little man, the most dim witted, clueless and dopey pooch going, but also the most cuddly and loveable. saying that though, he's becoming pretty epic at fetch, so i suppose hes not entirely dim, just selective hearing....much like another pooch i know, mentioning no nmes *cough...cody!*, little ginger monster! watching him and his brother together is hillarious though, i could honestly sit and watch them play all day.

all in all i think thats about it really, i mean life is neither here nor there, but slowly working out of the mess and getting organised....somewhat. anyways, its late, im tired, ive got too much going on in my head. think its time for a bit of family guy or south park to zone out to.

ciao x